Dealing with Your Nerves on a First Date

If you are going on a date with someone that you really like for the first time it is normal to be nervous.  Many people allow for their nerves to get the best of them, which works to sabotage their relationship.  You don’t have to give into your nerves; instead you can take charge and make sure that you have a great first date despite having the jitters!  Everyone is nervous on a first date, even if just a little bit, so take charge of those jitters and have a good time.

1. Admit that you are feeling nervous.  Many people do not want to admit that they are feeling nervous, but trying it keep it all in actually makes the nerves worse.  When you just tell your date that you are feeling nervous you’ll get it out there, you’ll feel like you can relax a bit, and you might find comfort in the fact that they too are nervous!

2. Be yourself.  We often allow the jitters to take over when we are worried about putting our best face forward.  Instead of being focused on being the best that you can be, just focus on being yourself.  When you are committed to being who you really are you will find that the date will move along much more smoothly and that the nerves slowly dissipate.

3. Get the conversation started.  If you are worried that you aren’t going to have anything to talk about, simply start with what you know you have in common.  If you met through friends talk about how you met your friends, if you met at the mall talk about what you were shopping for, and so on.  When you get the conversation started chances are that you will be able to keep it going.

4. Compliment them.  A great way to get things going is to complicate your date.  Don’t simply compliment them on anything though; make sure that your compliment is sincere.  When you are sincere in your compliments it will put your date at ease, let them know that you like them, and things will likely take off.

5. Listen when your date talks.  Many people worry that they don’t have anything to talk about, but you’ll always have something to talk about if you simply listen to what they are saying.  If the conversation suddenly dies off, pull something out from what they said and ask them to elaborate on it.  It’ll make them feel good that you were listening and you’ll learn more about them.

If you follow these simple tips you will find that your jitters disappear or at least manageable.  If possible, pick the place where you will be going on the date so you are somewhere that you are comfortable, because this will help you feel more at ease on the date, as well.  You may also be able to help them choose something to eat or drink, which is a great way to break the ice.

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