Finally Make Your That Clean Break
It seems that we have all been guilty of breaking up but not really breaking up in the past. Do you currently find yourself leaning on your ex for certain things or even being physical with them? This is more common than you might think and while you thought that none of your friends would ever guess that you hadn’t really made a clean break, you may be surprised to find that a lot of them have done the same thing at some point in the past.
Does your inability to make the clean break confuse you? Do you go back and forth between feeling like you shouldn’t have broken up at all to feeling angry that you cannot make that clean break? Do you promise yourself that each time you are together it will be your last, yet you find that you keep getting together? This can be a dangerous cycle because generally it leads to one or both of you being hurt again and again by the same issues.
If you broke up, you should stay broken up. This doesn’t mean that if you love one another and just hit a bump in the road that you shouldn’t try to make it work. What it means is that if you know that the relationship will never work and you know that you shouldn’t be together, you should make the move to end the relationship once and for all. The way you do this is make sure that you both have all of your things, get all of your financial and personal information in order and separated, and then let your partner know that this is it. Tell them that you will not be making any more contact and you truly need a clean break.
Don’t be tempted to call your ex or to accept their calls. Instead, give yourself a month apart and then reassess the situation. You may find that the first couple weeks are really difficult because you have always relied on the person for certain things and you may just need a bit of reassurance. Don’t allow yourself to make the call and don’t take their calls for this one month period, once you get through this period you will see whether or not you can make it on your own and chances are you will feel better because of it.
Instituting the clean break is one of the most difficult things that you will ever do, especially if you had a particularly intense relationship. You need to give yourself this month because chances are you will not look back after this. A month is the time you need to strike out on your own and get a taste of the world without your ex. Only after this month should you allow yourself to accept any calls or communication from your ex, and even at this point you should remain a bit guarded.