Do not Smother Your Mate
We have all either had the experience of feeling suffocated within a relationship or we have done the smothering that leads to this sensation. It is easy to get caught in the trap where you want to love someone so much that you smother them, but there is a big difference between loving someone and smothering them. When you know the differences it will be easier to keep yourself and your relationship on the right track so neither of you feels smothered at any time.
The biggest difference between loving and smothering is the fact that smothering is all about selfishness. People who smother are looking at what they want from the other person, what they need, and how often they want to be with their love interest. Love is different in that it is much more generous and giving so that you are able to feel great affection for a person while giving them their space. This can be a fine line, but it is one that you want to observe if you want your relationship to work.
If you are smothering your mate you are going to be more demanding of them. When we smother someone we want information right now and we demand the answers to the questions that we answer. These questions may be about the future, about when you will be together next, etc. Love is much gentler and when you are in love instead of smothering, you wait for the answers to come naturally. Again, this is a subtle but importance difference that must be observed if you want to be successful in your relationship.
If you are smothering someone you are not really taking into consideration what the other person wants. For instance, you may not give them the space that they have told you that they need and you may just continue to do what you believe is best, even if it is not. Love is found where both people take into consideration not just what they want from the relationship, but what their mate wants as well. This is an important distinction and can often help you define whether you are smothering or loving your mate.
Those who smother often tell their mates what they should think, feel and do. When you smother someone you are attempting to control them. This is different than love because when you love someone you may not always share the same feelings, thoughts, and actions but you respect and support autonomy. You are two individual people and you should embrace this instead of trying to control everything that your love interest does.
As you can see, there are some very fundamental differences between those who smother and those who love. While a lot of people who smother start out with good intentions, they can go wrong when you lose sight of the difference between loving and smothering. Observe these differences to have a truly healthy relationship!